Reality Ravings

Ok when are they actually going to get to LA? This was episode 2 and the only plane they had gotten on was to go to Melbourne.

This episode I actually found quite irritating. What with Jordan Loukas being called a Marrickville Ghetto chick - from my viewing her family lived in a very nice terrace, with no signs ice smoking paraphernalia in sight.

I know Marrickville Metro can get ugly on Centrelink payment day but I would not call it South Central, LA. The deadliest weapons you see are star war light sabres that toddlers get from the local $2 dollar shop.

The other issue if Charlotte Dawson is so upmarket why does she have more tattoos then a bikers moll?

Also Jordan's constant whining was getting on my nerves. Does she really want to end up flipping burgers at the local yeeros shop for the rest of her life talking about what she could have been.

Jordan seems to have seen the one and only episode of the Victoria Beckham welcome to LA series and is channelling her in a bad way like using her accent, not the not eating bit however.

As an aside I think they should do more episode's on Posh Spice it was a hoot that show.

First up Jordan met Charlotte to look over her picture portfolio which they did over a car bonnet somewhere ?Wooloomoollo to get the harbour view in the background. Wouldn't it have been easier to do this in a coffee shop? What was the point of that?

Some of the pictures are great, but Charlotte tells her she needs to tone up and lose her muffin top. So stop eating carbs honey. Jordan apparently has a fear of choking so only eating smooth things, hence the job at Boost Juice, she could get all the free smoothies she wanted.

Charlotte castigates her for knowing nothing about fashion, and takes her to Jayson Brundson's, top Australian Fashion designer, store to work in retail for the day.

She gets put in a little cocktail dress, which she has to keep on hitching up as it is to big on her. This is the bit where I wondered how staged it was, as she was definitely playing up to the cameras.

Also then Charlotte, and Jay, who Charlotte had told Jordan that he was in New York, watched her on a tv in another room.

Jordan annoyed me with her ohmigod I going to have to work in a shop attitude and clearly could not give a shit.

Charlotte was over acting huffing and puffing with how terrible she was. Clearly Jordan is not the sharpest tool in the shed, but would she be that stupid to come across as so lacklustre about the task with the camera's on her.

Finally Jayson goes in as a "pretend customer" and then Charlotte cannot stand it anymore as "it is embarrassing for Jayson". Agreeing to be on this show is embarrassing for Jordan, especially when she was bagging out his designs.

But Jordan seem quite non-plussed about the telling off from Charlotte. "I should have put more effort in" etc. She seems to make excuses about everything that she does wrong.

Also did not apologise to Jayson when he told her he had ruin his dress.

Next Charlotte takes her to Melbourne to be in a fashion parade at the Royal Melbourne Show. To try and add spice to proceedings Paloma is there and Charlotte tells Jordan that whoever is best she will take to LA.

Paloma was pissed Jordan got her own show and say "She was the more entertaining one" and at this stage of the episode I had to agree.

Jordan goes out on the cat walk and glowers at the crowd. After the first show Charlotte comes backstage and gives her some good advice, "use your props like the mirror ball etc".

Jordan does second show - no change. Again Charlotte comes backstage to give the same advice.

Jordan does third show - no change. Charlotte walks out supposedly angry. Actually I don't blame her. Jordan says "I just look fierce, and don't do anything at the end of the runway that is what I do." She did not want to do what Charlotte advised her to do then gets upset when she walks out.

"My two fathers rejected me and now Charlotte has" Jordan sobs. I think she needs to show some sense of responsibility. I had a feeling that excuse had been used a lot for every fuck up she has ever done.

I really want to like Jordan, but this episode I was finding it very difficult to.

The next day Jordan got taken for a make over including speech lessons to get rid of her Marrickville accent. Maybe they mistook the whine in her voice as a inner western dialect.

After she is all gussied up she is taken to a nightclub where Charlotte sprung on her she would be co-hosting a fashion parade with her, and gave her a script to learn.

This time Jordan did do well, even though the way Jordan was dressed (Sunday afternoon croquet game) was different from the Ed Hardy clothes she was promoting, which are young, casual and funky.

So Charlotte and her were back being best friends after that.
Next week finally they get to LA.